


Conversations on Growing Pains

by Sundance201



Category: Grey's Anatomy
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, F/F, F/M, One Big Happy Family, Unconventional Families, Unplanned Pregnancy, lots of talking about babies
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-03
Updated: 2020-10-03
Packaged: 2021-03-08 04:27:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,857
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26799547
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sundance201/pseuds/Sundance201
Summary: Lexie hops on board the baby train with Mark, Callie, and Arizona. There are ups and downs, but it's all worth it in the end. Some conversations that could have been if 7x14 went a little differently.
Relationships: Arizona Robbins/Callie Torres, Callie Torres & Mark Sloan, Lexie Grey/Mark Sloan
Comments: 3
Kudos: 99





	Conversations on Growing Pains

**Author's Note:**

> Just what I wish would have happened in 7x14 after Meredith urging Lexie to "grow up." These are just some conversations that I think should have happened between Mark, Lexie, Callie, and Arizona. Hope that this one-shot can hold you over while waiting for updates to "In a Better Light" and "Talking and Laughing." 
> 
> Hope that you enjoy! Please let me know what you think!

Lexie could tell that Mark was surprised when he opened the door. "Lexie! Is everything ok?"

"Can I...can I come in?"

He nodded and opened the door wider. She held tightly onto her bag, as if it could give her some sort of strength. She turned to Mark and he was leaning against the counter, his arms crossed over his chest. He was waiting for her to start, which only seemed fair, since she was the one who showed up at his place at 11pm.

She took a deep breath and figured it was just best to get it all out there. "I feel like you're leaving me behind. Like...baby train is leaving the station and you told me just as the train started moving and I don't even have time to pack or buy a ticket, you just want me to run down the tracks to catch the train and ride it with you. And that's not fair, Mark. It's not fair. Maybe you weren't planning on the train ride either but at least you have a ticket! I'm playing catch-up."

He didn't say anything for a little bit, he just kept staring at her. Finally, he sighed and looked down, his hand coming up to rub at his chin. "I shouldn't have told you that way, Lexie. I realize that now. I just hate keeping things from you and…and I was excited. I am excited. And I'm not the guy who plans out speeches - I just had to get it out there. I couldn't keep it from you. But I also...didn't know how to tell you. I messed up."

She set her purse down on the island and sat down. She watched Mark relax somewhat and she realized belatedly that he was subconsciously guarding the door, trying to stop her from leaving again.

"Meredith told me to grow up today. And I realized that I was being a bitch to my dad's tattooed sl...new girlfriend. And I was having such a shitty day and even though I snapped at you and said you were a part of the shittiness...god, as I was leaving the hospital, all I really wanted to do was tell you about it. I was exhausted and ready to pass out, but all I wanted to do was come here. Because you know about my dad and you know me and I just…missed you so much."

She looked up at him, tears shimmering in her eyes. Mark immediately stepped forward and reached out, rubbing her shoulder softly. She rubbed her forehead and then leaned forward, resting her head against his chest. He stroked her hair gently as she cried softly into his shirt. "I can't be all in, Mark. I can't. Not yet. But I can't…I don't want this to be the end. I don't want to be done. I told Avery today that we had to be done because of this but that's not actually what I want. It can't just be black and white, can it?"

"Lex, I won't give up being a part of this baby's life," he said, his voice hard, even as he kept stroking her hair.

She took a deep breath and leaned back, looking at him. "I would never ask you to. I know how much a baby means to you. But Mark...I need to know that I mean something to you too."

"Lexie - of course you do. I love you, Lexie. I love you more than any woman I've ever known."

She smiled sadly at him and she reached out to him, lightly stroking his chest. "I know that you are going to be a dad. And that is so great. You are going to be such a great dad. But I'm not ready to be a mom, Mark. I'm not. I'm 27. I'm still just starting my career."

Mark stepped forward, gently placing his hands on her shoulders. "Lexie...this baby already has two moms. And I'm the father and I'm going to take that very seriously but...I know you're not ready to be a mom. That's ok."

"So it's ok with you if I still live at Meredith's? If I don't want to go to Callie's appointments? If I can't...go to a daycare party because I have a surgery?" She couldn't help but challenge him. Before she hopped on the baby train with him, she had to know how he really felt.

"Lex, would you ever harm this baby?"

"No! God no! Mark!" She jerked away from him and stared in horror. "Do you - do you think I would?"

He shook his head. "I know you wouldn't. That's all...that's all I ask. I know I have no right to ask anything else. And however much you want to be involved…we'll figure it out. We can figure it out. Right?"

Lexie sighed and closed her eyes. "I'm growing up. I don't want this to play out like it did last time. I don't want to be left behind. But you've got to promise me you'll start considering me in things, Mark. It's not just you anymore. I'm going to be your partner. It's me and Callie and Arizona and this baby. And we are all going to have to work together. We're going to have to talk about things. Because that's what grown-ups do." She looked up at him, her smile uncertain. "I'm on this baby train, but you've got to give me time to catch up, ok?"

Mark's grin was bright and not for the first time, Lexie had a moment of realizing that this crazy handsome man was all hers. "I promise. I will, Lex, I promise. I won't make a move without consulting you."

"Ok, well that is just extreme," she whispered as he moved closer to her.

"May I kiss you, Lexie Grey?" he questioned, hovering over her as she sat up straighter on the barstool.

She smiled. "Yes, you may, Mark Sloan," she acquiesced with a giggle. He kissed her softly - it felt like he was trying to apologize with his kiss.

"Do you want to talk about your shitty day?" he offered as he pulled away.

Lexie grinned up at him. "I do. But can we do it in bed? I'm exhausted and I just…I can barely hold my head up."

"Yeah of course, Lex."

"No funny business. Just sleep," she said, pointing her finger at him. He turned to lock the front door as she took off her coat and draped it over the barstool after she stood.

"Yeah, we're both going to have to keep each other in check on that one," he murmured, grabbing her proffered hand as she led them back to the bedroom. Lexie scoffed and Mark just chuckled in response. "Oh please, Miss Teach Me. You're just as guilty as I am."

"Shut up."

His eyes sparkled. "I'm your attending; you can't tell me to shut up."

She laughed and stopped suddenly, rising onto her tip toes rapidly to kiss him. "Shut up."

* * *

Mark was just exiting the elevator at the hospital when he almost literally ran into Callie. "Hey where were you this morning? I expected you and Arizona to be all up in my face again, but it was just Arizona."

"Lexie slept over last night," he said as they walked down the hall together.

"Lexie's back in the picture?" Mark just nodded. Callie's lips pursed. "And...she's fine?"

He shrugged. "She was using a train metaphor. Said that I told her as the baby train was leaving the station and I need to give her time to catch up. But she's on the train. She doesn't want this to be the end. I don't either. We agreed that we would talk about things more. I just need to give her some space, Cal."

"She doesn't want you to change right? She knows that you're going to be involved."

"Yeah of course she does. And she wants me to be. She just doesn't know how involved she's going to be. But that's ok. We have time to figure that out."

"Mark," Callie started out, but Mark shook his head.

"She's in. And I'm going to let her decide how far in she is. I'm the father of this child but she's not the mother. I get it and I'm going to let her be in control of how involved she is. It's not like she's determined to ignore the kid. She's not a monster. She's just…she's not the parent. Not yet…maybe not ever. That's on you and me and Arizona."

"And that's ok with you?"

He paused before nodding. "It is. For where we are right now, it is. And you know Lexie. Her heart is so big…she's going to love this kid. She might not be a parent, but she'll love this kid."

Callie sighed and turned to Mark. "What if she's not ready, Mark? What if this kid is born and she freaks out and walks out again? We have to have stability to raise a baby. She's got to be all in."

Mark shook his head. "No. She doesn't. I'm letting her decide how far in she is. She didn't have any say in this, Callie. This isn't her kid. She doesn't have to be all in. Not right now. I'm going to give her time to adjust." He sighed and scratched at his beard. "We messed up, Cal. We might've been single at the time and this baby is a great thing, but…we messed up."

"This baby isn't a punishment, Mark."

"That's not what I'm saying! I'm just saying…I don't know. I don't know what I'm saying. I just know that I don't want Lexie to walk away from me again and I know that I want to be in my baby's life. That's it. That's all I know for sure, Cal."

Callie sighed and patted Mark on the shoulder. "You're lucky that we've still got time to figure this out."

"But we will figure it out, right?"

Callie gave him a soft, half smile. "I think that's going to be up to the two of you."

* * *

"Mark?" Lexie whispered. She was tucked against his side with her head on his chest, and his fingers were trailing up and down her back. "After this baby...do you...do you think you'll want more?"

His fingers froze on her back and she started to stroke his chest, almost as if the energy had transferred from him to her. She wanted to keep him calm - she could hear his heartbeat starting to pick up. "That's not really my choice, Lex."

"Whose choice is it then?" she asked, her eyes narrowed in confusion as she looked up at him.

He craned his neck and gently brushed his lips against hers. It was barely even a kiss and it left her wanting more. He always left her wanting more. "It's yours. You're it for me, Lexie Grey. So, you're the one who gets to decide."

She nodded and kept stroking his chest. "I want kids, Mark. I do. I want your kids. Eventually. Someday."

"Really?"

"Yeah. Plus, this kid shouldn't be an only child. They always turn out terrible."

His face screwed up, looking comically offended. "Thanks Lex. Very kind of you."

She playfully shoved him. "Oh, you don't really count as an only child. You had Derek and all his sisters."

"What about your sister?"

She looked up at him, her eyebrow raised skeptically. "Meredith 'Dark and Twisty' Grey?"

"Right. Point taken."

She sighed. "That was…that was part of the reason I've reacted so badly. To Sloan. To Callie." He looked down at her and she looked up at him, her hand coming up to cover his face. "Nope. I can't take you looking at me right now. Look away, Sloan!" she cried out, turning his head away from her.

He chuckled slightly but did as she asked and kept his head turned away from her as she continued confessing. "It is ridiculous and possessive, and I know who you are and your past and...it doesn't matter. Because I get stupidly jealous about these women who have had you before. And I get so upset that…they're giving you what you want. And that it's not something that can come from just me. I want to have your baby, Mark. I never said I didn't. I just can't right now. I can't. I can't derail all my hard work with a baby right now."

There was silence between them for a moment before Mark finally spoke. "Can I look at you again?"

She giggled. "Yes."

He turned to her and smiled. "Lex, I'll wait. I just ask that we maybe start having kids before you have to put me in the old folks home, ok?"

"So what you're only giving me like...five years?"

"Ouch!" he exclaimed, holding his hand over his heart. "That was mean, Lexie Grey! Mean!"

"I'm just teasing!" She was quiet for a few moments, drawing absent-minded patterns on his skin with her fingertips. "I forget sometimes how big an age gap there is between us. You're just so youthful. You have so much energy and your body is in better shape than men that are twenty years your junior," she whispered, rubbing her fingers now down to his abs and tracing the muscles there.

"Thank you, Lex. But you're right - I'm no spring chicken."

She hummed her vague agreement. Mark was started to drift off when she spoke again. "Two years?"

"What?"

"Give me two years. I'll be in the last year of my residency…if we time it right, I can have some time off between residency and starting a fellowship somewhere…it could work."

"Two years before we start trying? Or have an actual baby to bring home in two years?" he asked, pressing his lips to the top of her head in a kiss.

"I don't know…and really that's just an arbitrary number. My plans never seem to work out the way I think they're going to…but at least this gives us something to work towards?" She propped herself up on his chest. "I won't leave you wondering forever. I want you to know that…I do want a baby. Your baby, Mark. I've never told you that before, but it's true."

He nodded and tilted her chin up for a kiss. "Two years. Or something. Whenever you're ready, Grey. I'll be here whenever you're ready."

* * *

Lexie found Arizona sitting in the cafeteria. "Hey, do you mind if I join you?"

"Hey Lexie! Of course! Take a seat."

"Where are Mark and Callie? Expected to see them down here with you. Everything go ok at the appointment?" she asked, munching on her carrot sticks.

"Oh yeah, everything is fine. They got pulled into a surgery right after Callie's appointment. Honestly, I'm sort of relieved. Those appointments are…a lot. Four doctors in the room, with only one of them being the actual doctor is…a lot of doctors. It's nice to have some time to decompress." Arizona smiled at Lexie and took a sip of her iced tea. "You know, you're more than welcome to join us. You don't have to but…if you want to."

"I thought you said it was already too much with the three of you. You don't want another person in the mix, do you?"

Arizona shrugged. "But you're a part of the team, Lexie. And I know that we've all agreed that you don't have to be all in like the rest of us, but you don't have to be totally hands-off either. You're a part of the team. You don't have to stay on the outskirts if you don't want to." Arizona grinned at her.

"Thanks, Arizona. I…I really do appreciate that," Lexie said softly. "How are you…so calm with this whole situation? I mean you come back from Africa and your girlfriend is pregnant with my boyfriend's baby. I thought I was blindsided by it, but at least I knew that they were living together. At least I was…here."

Arizona's normally brilliant grin tightened somewhat, dimming, as she looked down at her plate. "It's not easy, Lexie. And honestly, sometimes I wish that I had the courage to do what you did and walk away. But I gave up Africa for Calliope. And if I gave her up too…what else would I have?" She reached out and placed her hand over Lexie's. "I had finally started to come around on the idea of kids. I'm guessing that you and Mark never really got around to talking about it again after Sloan?"

Lexie shook her head. "No. We definitely didn't…we're talking about it now though." She laughed. "Not just because there's an actual baby on the way. We're talking about my thoughts on babies in general. And future babies. Our future babies."

Arizona smiled. "Good. I'm glad. I'm glad that you guys are talking. I think that you're good for Mark. He seems more…grown-up with you around. More stable." She tilted her head and examined Lexie. "You're happy, aren't you, Lexie? Happy with Mark?"

"Of course! Of course I am. I…missed him. I really did. And this is a lot, but…I can't help but think that he's worth it. It's worth it to go through this with him because he's worth it."

She grinned. "He is really lucky that he has you. And we are really lucky that you're sticking around. Because this baby is going to have the best support system. And all of us who are raising the baby, we're lucky to have each other. We're lucky to have you, Lexie."

Lexie smiled and leaned forward, catching Arizona in an impromptu embrace. "I'm lucky I have you guys too. Especially you. Thank you, Arizona."

* * *

Lexie started to be more involved, going to some of Callie's appointments, and being more present and active in various baby discussions. But Callie seemed indifferent to her. Lexie figured it was because Callie thought she was flaky and selfish, that she was going to walk out the second that things got tough. And she could tell that the tension between them was starting to weigh on Mark and Arizona. She knew it couldn't go on forever, but she also didn't know how to finally address it.

Lexie was off one morning, reading through medical journals when a familiar knock sounded on the door. Callie's knock. "It's open!"

Callie came in and smiled briefly at Lexie. "Hey, can I borrow your blender? I think it's technically our blender and Arizona gave it to Mark when we were going to move to Africa…I just never took it back and now I am craving a smoothie like you can't even believe." She rubbed at her growing baby bump and Lexie smiled, waving her hand towards the kitchen.

"Of course! Blend away! I think I last saw it in the cabinet to the left of the oven."

She heard Callie opening the cabinets and giving a small cry of achievement when she found the appliance in question. "Hey, Callie! When you're done making your smoothie…can we talk?" Lexie asked softly, afraid to look up from her medical journal.

After a moment of silence, she finally did though. Callie almost looked…guilty? But then she smiled at Lexie and nodded. "Yeah, of course, Lexie. Do you just want to come over? I'll make enough smoothie for you too."

Lexie grinned, putting her reading down. "Well, how can I resist the promise of a smoothie?" She got up and followed Callie across the hall, taking a seat at the island as Callie threw the ingredients of the smoothie into the blender.

Callie grabbed two glasses and filled them both up when the smoothie was all blended and Lexie grinned as Callie handed her a glass. They were quiet for a few minutes, silently drinking their smoothies. Lexie was trying to gather her thoughts and she was sure that Callie was doing the same.

Finally, she set her glass down and she took a deep breath. "I know that you're not my biggest fan and I get it. I'm the one that keeps walking away from Mark. I'm the one that keeps being selfish and breaking your best friend's heart. I get it. But I just…I want you to see it from my perspective." She looked down at her hands in her lap, unable to face Callie as she made this particular confession.

"I've always been jealous of you, Callie. It got better when we got to know each other and we became friends but…you're hot. You're hot and Mark's slept with you…a lot. And he loves you, in his own way. So I've always been jealous. And then…I know we weren't together when you guys hooked up. I know that. But we also…weren't not together, you know? We were in that weird in between stage. And he told me so soon after we got back together. It just…it was so much."

She took another deep breath and looked up at Callie. "I know that I shouldn't be jealous. But I am. You're having my boyfriend's baby and he loves you and…I'm jealous. But I want to not be jealous. I want us to be friends again. We have to be friends if we're all going to raise this baby together."

Callie smiled softly and her and nodded. "I know. I know, Lexie. And I'm sorry…I should have talked to you sooner. But it was easier to just…not. I didn't want to talk to you. Because honestly, I feel guilty. And I don't want to feel guilty. The only thing I want to feel is happy, because I am so happy that this baby exists."

Lexie's brow furrowed. "Why would you feel guilty?"

"Lexie, that night with Mark - it was a mistake. He had been trying to get me laid all night at Joe's, saying that I just needed a 'sexual palate cleanser.' Or 'sexual sorbet,' as a very drunk Bailey called it." Lexie stifled a laugh at the image of stern Dr. Bailey coining the phrase.

Callie grinned, sharing in the mirth, before turning serious again. "That night I asked Mark for sorbet and-" she laughed, shaking her head. "He literally thought I was asking for dessert. He didn't…it's not that he didn't want sex, because Mark always wants sex, but…he didn't want to sleep with me, Lexie. It wasn't even on his radar. But when I made it clear what I wanted…he gave it to me."

She shook her head, rubbing her forehead. "I was the one who told him he was good for more than sex and then I go and use him to scratch my itch the second I can't find somebody else. But he's Mark and he's my friend and he never made me feel like…I should be guilty. But I did – feel guilty, I mean. It wasn't what either of us really wanted. We both knew it was a mistake. And then…I take a test and find out that our mistake…gave us a little miracle. And I didn't want to feel guilty. I didn't want to feel like it was a mistake because all I wanted to do was feel happy about the little life that I had growing inside me."

Callie finally looked up at Lexie and gave her a soft smile. "So I didn't want to think about how it made you feel. And I know that's awful because I should absolutely have been thinking about how it made you feel. But I just wanted to be happy. I want this baby to just be a happy thing. And I can't feel happy if I think about how Mark and I put you in this difficult situation again."

"So we're both just feeling bad feelings that we don't want to feel?" Lexie asked, a slight gleam in her eye.

Callie laughed and nodded. "I suppose that's one way of putting it."

"Can we just put it behind us? Can we just…agree to move forward? Because that's what's best for this weird little family unit?" Lexie proposed, smiling softly at Callie.

With tears leaking out of her eyes, Callie smiled and nodded, wiping at her cheeks. "I'd like that, Lexie." She leaned forward to give Lexie a hug, but suddenly reared back, her hand going to her bump. "Oh!"

Lexie's eyes grew wide. "What? What is it? Is something wrong?"

Callie started crying again, shaking her head and grabbing Lexie's hand, pressing it against where she had just had her hand a moment ago. Lexie still looked concerned, until she felt a small kick against her hand. "Oh my god!" she exclaimed. "Oh my god, the baby just kicked! Is that the first time you've felt her kick?"

Callie nodded and Lexie grinned, looking down at her hand on Callie's bump in awe. "Oh my god," Lexie whispered. "Our baby kicked."

Grinning, Callie dove forward, pulling Lexie into a tight hug. "Our baby kicked. And I'm so glad that I got to share this moment with you, Lexie. Thank you for hopping on board the baby train with us. It wouldn't be the same without you. You're a part of this family."

"Thank you, Callie. I'm honored…I won't let you down. Any of you."

* * *

Mark sighed as he heard Sofia crying over the monitor. He shifted slightly, trying to wake up enough to get up and feed his daughter. But suddenly he felt Lexie's hand on his chest. "You have a big surgery tomorrow. Go back to sleep. I've got her."

He felt the bed shift and watched as she slipped out of the door. He could hear her on the baby monitor when she reached Sofia's crib, could hear her cooing and talking to his daughter. "C'mon, baby girl. Let's go get you a midnight snack, yeah? Yeah, let's go get a snack so you can let daddy sleep." Her voice got fainter as she moved away from the monitor, and Mark couldn't help but smile. After a few minutes, he got up and moved out into the apartment.

Lexie was sitting on the couch, holding Sofia as she drank from her bottle. Lexie was whispering away to Sofia as she ate and Mark couldn't help the wave of love that he felt come over him at the sight. Lexie looked up and smiled softly at him. "Hey. I thought I told you to go back to sleep. I've got this."

He came over to sit next to her, wrapping one arm around Lexie and gently stroking Sofia's head. "I wanted to be out here with my girls." He pressed a kiss against her temple, and she leaned against him as Sofia continued to eat, her soft suckling noises filling the space.

"What were you talking about when I came out?" Mark whispered.

Lexie laughed softly. "I was reciting state capitals. She seems to like to hear me talk while she's eating, and it was the first thing that came to mind."

Mark grinned and placed another kiss against her hairline, and she sighed happily, settling into him further. They fell into a comfortable silence again, both just staring down at the baby in Lexie's arms. Lexie's hand came up and she gently stroked one of Sofia's little cheeks. "I really love her," she whispered.

Mark's arm tightened around her briefly. "Yeah?"

Lexie nodded, still stroking Sofia's cheek. "Yeah. Thank you for letting me be a part of her life." She turned to him and leaned forward enough to press a gentle kiss to his lips.

"Thank you for hopping on the baby train with me. I know I didn't make it easy for you," he replied, his thumb stroking against the soft skin of her arm. He looked at her in amazement. "God, what did I ever do to deserve you, Lexie Grey?"

"You made a woman speak. You fought Derek for me. You taught me. You never gave up on me." She leaned in for another kiss. "You loved me."

He smiled at her when they broke apart, before looking down at Sofia, who was now sated and her eyes were drooping, as she started to drift off again. Mark grinned down at his daughter and reached for her. "I'll burp her and put her down again." Lexie nodded and surrendered Sofia to her father, watching him lovingly for a moment before getting up off the couch to clean and sanitize the baby bottle.

When they got back in bed, Lexie curled up next to Mark, nestled against his side. "Love you, Mark," she whispered, pressing a soft kiss to his chest, right above his heart.

"Love you too, Lex," he murmured, kissing the top of her head. "Thank you for sticking around."


End file.
